We love you dearly. And we always will.
Their beauty, love and wisdom has been a tribute to us all. We honour them. We worship them. They make us feel nice inside. Here's to love. Here's to you, Zoe and Julian.
UPDATE.
The lovers recently moved to London together, sharing their first house. Now they have gone, this town seems somehow ... empty. As if a special part of us has been ripped cruelly away. Now you have gone, we can feel only sorrow, but know we have our fond memories to look back on.
Take care and good luck in your lives. And visit us soon. This town is grey without you.
FURTHER UPDATE.
We have been blessed with many visits from the lovers. And yes, they've announced their intentions to stop living in the foul den of sleaze and intrigue which will surely condemn them to an eternity in HELL and get married. That's nice, isn't it? So, make a date in your diaries. December 11th will be the day on which they finally join the blessed union which is holy matrimony. Marvellous, really, isn't it? And I get to be an usher. Not Usher, the single man whirlwind of soul who wears swimming caps, no I get to utter the words "Beautiful Bride or Gorgeous Groom?" and hopefully get money for doing it.
The motif for the wedding will be polar bears. Guests will be required to dress accordingly.
AGAIN, ANOTHER UPDATE.
The various London borough councils, having heard of the aforementioned
den of sleaze and intrigue which the lovers habituated, pooled their resources
and time together and have successfully succeeded in evicting Mr Montague
and Miss Capulet. They applied for political asylum in many other British
towns (including Gourock of all places!), but the only place which would
accept them was Winchester. They now live in an old milk churn, which apparently
has been at it's location since the 13th century. It's a gorgeous property
and no mistake, the only drawback being the fact that their heads are being
permanently deformed into a cylindrical shape. Who can understand it?